The hit Netflix series “Baby Reindeer” is sparking a nuanced conversation about mental health by telling the tale of struggling comedian Donny Dunn and his stalker, Martha. Creator Richard Gadd based the story on his real experiences and deliberately tried to break from previous pop culture depictions of stalking. Instead of sexualizing stalking, the show aims to portray it as a mental illness with layers and human qualities not often seen on television before. Over the course of seven episodes, the series dives deep into the psychological journey of Martha’s unhealthy obsession with Donny and the role he plays in encouraging her.
Therapist Avigail Lev analyzes the mental challenges exhibited by both characters in the series. After watching “Baby Reindeer,” Lev diagnoses Martha with erotomania and borderline personality disorder. Erotomania is a delusional disorder where the person believes that someone else is in love with them, even when presented with evidence to the contrary. Martha’s behavior towards Donny is a manifestation of this disorder, along with obsessive actions and splitting, where she swings between idealizing and devaluing him quickly. Her inability to manage her emotions and impulses is another telltale sign of borderline personality disorder.
Regarding Donny, Lev suspects he may have post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) due to ongoing reactions to traumatic events in his life, particularly his experience of being raped by a former mentor. She also suggests that Donny may exhibit signs of Stockholm syndrome or trauma bonding with Martha, where he feels fond or sympathetic towards her despite her actions. These conditions are often seen in survivors of abuse or exploitation who reenact trauma in perilous situations as a way to regain control.
In terms of handling situations involving someone like Martha, Lev offers some advice for navigating these complex psychological conditions. It is essential to ignore the abuser completely, gather evidence through recordings and documentation, and communicate clearly that their behavior is not tolerated, outlining consequences and seeking legal protection if necessary. Finally, it is crucial to disengage completely, using techniques like the ‘gray rock’ method to minimize interaction and avoid escalating the situation further.
“Baby Reindeer” is being praised for its realistic and accurate portrayal of trauma and mental illness, offering viewers a unique perspective on stalking and its complexities. By shedding light on these issues and sparking conversations around mental health, the show is contributing to a more nuanced understanding of the challenges faced by individuals dealing with these conditions. Through the lens of Donny and Martha’s story, viewers are invited to explore the impact of trauma, abuse, and unhealthy attachments on mental health and relationships.
