In her experience as a dating coach, Kelsey Wonderlin has found that many of her clients, particularly women in finance, are concerned about the financial status of their potential partners. While evaluating someone based solely on their salary may seem superficial, how they choose to spend their money can be indicative of their values and priorities. It is important to have discussions about financial beliefs early on in a relationship, but asking directly about income on a first date is not appropriate. A person’s salary is just one aspect of their financial habits, and it is often the choices they make regarding money that can lead to disagreements in a relationship.
Instead of asking about salary, Wonderlin suggests posing more subtle questions to gauge your date’s financial habits. For example, asking what they like to spend their money on can reveal a lot about their priorities. Someone who enjoys traveling may have different goals than someone who prefers to splurge on the latest gadgets. Similarly, a person who prioritizes saving for a house may have a different mindset than someone who spends impulsively. By asking these types of questions, you can get a sense of whether your date’s financial values align with yours.
If you feel strongly about finding a partner who shares your financial habits, it is important to be upfront about it. You can express that financial stability is a nonnegotiable for you and discuss how you handle your own money. While this level of transparency may not be well-received by everyone, the right person for you will appreciate your honesty and openness. By being clear about your expectations and values regarding money, you can increase the chances of finding a compatible partner who shares your financial goals.
Overall, it is important to have discussions about money early on in a relationship to avoid potential conflicts down the road. While salary can be a factor in determining financial compatibility, it is not the only consideration. How someone chooses to spend and save their money can be just as important in determining whether you are a good match. By asking thoughtful questions and being transparent about your own financial values, you can increase the likelihood of finding a partner who shares your approach to money. Prioritize open communication and honesty in discussing financial matters to set a solid foundation for a healthy and harmonious relationship.
